There are really two factors that have made this week so difficult. First, the stress and tension of my job have contributed mightily to the air of doom thatís been hanging over me. And the second, related to the first, is how badly Iíve handled things — by which I mean, how easily Iíve given in to the stress and tension and let all that affect me physically and emotionally.
This isnít to downplay the very real physical and emotional weakness Iíve been feeling. I can know intellectually that I should be handling things better, and still feel as if Iím about to be crushed by an avalanche. All the vision in the world canít keep you from being hit by that bus if you insist on keeping your eyes closed.
The saving grace is that when itís outside forces that are bringing me down like this, thereís always the chance that things can turn around. And in fact they always do; otherwise I wouldnít be here now, because I would have surrendered to the forces of darkness long ago.