I made a determined effort to be happy today, or at least upbeat. I tried hard not to let the pressure get to me, and for most of the day it worked. I made it to mid afternoon without a meltdown.
Then, at about 3 pm, something hit me, hard. I donít know what it was or where it came from, but I was reeling, dizzy and lightheaded, and a little short of breath. If I didnít know better, Iíd think Iíd contracted sudden-onset malaria. I had to lie down. In the middle of the day.
Somehow I rallied, but I felt weak. I know it wasnít hunger that was doing this to me, because Iíd eaten breakfast and lunch. Could it have been stress, do you think? Iíve been on edge all week over this first billing cycle at The Kennel.
It wasnít that I didnít want to do the billing, or didnít think I could do it. It was simply that I couldnít get started until I had some information, and I didnít know what that information was. And nobody was communicating with me, so I wasnít even sure anyone was worrying about this but me.
Iím getting stressed all over again, just remembering.