The fact that I did everything wrong today is probably good news in the long run. I mean, the idea that I got through a day like this might mean that Iím in better shape than I thought. Although I havenít quite finished surviving it yet, have I?
My sleeping pattern lately has been so off-the-chart ridiculous that I needed two naps just to make it to a time when I could start winding down for tomorrow. I donít want to belabor it, because Iíve probably had days that were this bad or even worse, but things seem to be catching up with me. The best-case outlook is that Iíve hit rock bottom and can look forward to better days ahead.
For some reason, I ate everything in sight today. I couldnít stop myself, and when I couldnít find any more bad things to eat, I rewrote my grocery list for tomorrow to add even more garbage, so that Iíll never run out of pizza rolls and Eskimo pies again. Not until I have another day when I eat them all at once, that is. By tonight I couldnít even look at a salad, I was so stuffed with cheese puffs and chocolate bars.
It doesnít seem possible that it could get any worse. And yet, I probably donít feel as bad now as I will tomorrow, when the reaction sets in. Maybe thatís the point. Maybe I have to suffer to get back on track.
No, what I have to do to get back on track is sleep. Thatís for starters, anyway.