Iím not sure why I thought things would be any different. I mean, we worked together and weathered the crisis. Everything is going to be okay, and by ďokay,Ē I mean pretty darn good. But today was just another day for the Boss. He started early this morning, going over yet again all the problems we just got through solving (and can no longer do anything about, even if we did something wrong).
Then when I got back from the post office, there was a note on the fax machine, an invoice Iíd paid recently with the words ďCall me!Ē scribbled across it. Apparently I shouldnít have paid that bill. And this afternoon he phoned and said ďTim want those cost reports,Ē as if I didnít have enough to think about. Iíll get to those cost reports as soon as I get to them, and no sooner. I didnít say that, but I didnít have to. He could hear it in my voice.
The difference wasnít in what happened, but in how I handled it. I didnít panic. I didnít throw things or kick things or punch the wall. I pounded on the desk, but just a little. Then I got on with my business, the stuff I knew I had to do today. It actually felt good to know that what I was doing was more important than what Iíd been asked to do.
In fact, I feel good about a lot of things these days. Itís as if all we went through at the end of the year brought me through some kind of barrier, to a new place where I have a little more confidence. Itís been a long time coming, and itís fragile, but itís there.