It's too bad I hate misplacing things so much, because I'm really good at it. This time it's the check register that shows whether or not I recorded depositing my last paycheck. I just finished one register and started another, and all it shows at the top of the first page is the balance. And I don't know if this balance includes that check or not.
This is a big deal, because the end of the month is looming like the dark clouds over the North Bay. If I did record the deposit, I can pay my rent. If I didn't, I can't. It's that simple.
So I've spent the last two days, whenever I could spare a minute, looking for the old register. The trouble with searching piecemeal this way is that you forget where you've already looked. Or even if you don't forget, you feel as if you have to look there again anyway, in case you missed it.
Mostly I stand in the middle of the room with a vacant look on my face, turning slowly around, looking up at the ceiling and out the window and other places where I couldn't possible have put this thing. Then I'll dig through the waste baskets and recycling bags again.
I've looked in my paid bills file and my canceled checks. In a corner of a closet I keep a lockbox that I've opened and closed a dozen times. I have a file box where I keep important papers. Nothing. Nowhere. Up in smoke.
There's probably something I can do to reactivate my memory, but for the life of me I don't know what. I've looked in all the logical and illogical places. Whatever it is I'm overlooking will probably come to me in the middle of the night. I'm up anyway, so I might as well have an idea once in awhile.