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Monday, August 23, 2004

You know, I'm on the outside looking in here. All I know is what people have told me, so I don't know who's exaggerating, who's taking things the wrong way, and who has who's making a little pile of sand into Mount Vesuvius, lava and all.

My guess is that it's the usual suspects. People who usually exaggerate are now telling me their truth, which is the truth as they see it. The fact that they see a different truth from everyone else's doesn't occur to them, because they've locked themselves into a skewed view of life that gives too much weight to the smallest, most unintended slight.

And those who tend to take things the wrong way are listening to someone else's words without hearing what's really on their mind. And if you can't decipher, in a simple conversation, what's on someone else's mind, how are you ever going to figure out what's in their heart? If you see the rest of the world as guilty until proven innocent, it's almost impossible to smooth over the jagged edges of a relationship.

It's so much simpler to listen to the other person and give them the benefit of the doubt. Seeing someone else's side of the argument just might make you question your own certainty. That, I promise, is a good thing, almost every time. There are only two things that I'm sure of, and one of them is that there's nothing you can see that won't look different from another's perspective. (I forget what the other one is.)

20 August 2004

The Heavenly Bamboo adds a little fire to the garden.

I know a few people who think they're right all the time. They're a little hard to talk to, you know? When you're open-minded and flexible, it's hard to find common ground with a block of granite. Hand me a chisel and we'll talk.

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